January 29, 2014

Dance drama and friendship


Gilly was in competitive dance 3 years ago, due to her irresponsibility,  I pulled her out of the team.  She missed it especially her friends. As a mom, it was a hard decision to make but a year later, I realize that was the best decision I made. She became more responsible and even her grades improved and she made it to all honor classes.

Last July, we had to decide if she should join the competition team. After much mulling and friend's persuasion.  We are back in competitive dance.

Fast forward to Jan 14.  We were blindsided by our friends.  I knew they were not happy with the dance studio and a few teachers but I didn't know they would just drop out of the dance studio and competitive team.  It was not just the announcement from the teacher instead of our "friends" but the results of it.  Some dances were cancelled, some from a quartet to a trio, with change in song since you can't have 3 girls dancing a 4 brother dance, so they had go back and tweak another routine for these 3 girls who had no part in this decision.

When we came home from the team meeting, that is where I learnt, I was lied to, the mom told me they were taking a break but actually they had been scouting around for other dance studios.  Even asked a few other girls if they wanted to switch studios.  Thank God they didn't because its easier to manage a 2 short than 3 or 4 short of dancer choreography.

Then comes the heartbreaking statement from my girl. The whole summer she had a blast of a time with these girls.  Now she realize they didn't care much for her.  They didn't come watch her dance at the Nutcracker but went to another studio to watch the Christmas program.  I said, what are you going to do this summer? She said "I'll be the lone ranger, I'll get used to it."  Broke my heart but its ok, I will find ways to entertain her during summer. She certainly has learnt what types of friends are there in this world.  No more innocence for this 13 year old.

Just my two cents into motherhood and growing up with friends.

Update:  A few weeks after this post, I found out that one parent had told the teacher that my girl, who is no saint, was one of the girls that were mean to her daughter.  Now this is what I don't get, if my child is that mean and caused your daughter emotional trauma, then why the heck is your daughter facetime-ing my child 4 times.  Yes, 4 times !!!! This is where Gilly got confused.  Makes no sense except, they just blatantly used my child as an excuse to get out of their commitments.
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